I appreciate that the author wrote this book. A teenage girl that I care about seems remarkably willing to date boys that treat her poorly, and this book helped me understand better where she might be coming from emotionally. The author explained how she meet and married a man who was verbally abusive, what it took for her to leave the situation, and how she healed afterward. She includes some questions in the back that she found helpful to think through.
The author was very clear that verbal abuse is wrong and no one deserves this abuse. However, one of the author's counselors apparently wanted her to discover so many positive outcomes from surviving the experience that she'd be willing to thank her husband for the abuse. Huh?! That's sick. She should be thanking GOD for bringing positive lessons and growth from the experience, not thanking the person who did the abuse. Anyway, it's worth reading despite this.
I felt like the author restrained herself in describing certain situations maybe because its a Christian memoir, but the potential exclusion of details hindered me from actually understanding/empathizing her pain. No doubt words are hurtful and its hard to relive those moments. I just would've appreciated it more if she expressed more. i plan to use some of the exercises recommended from the book.
This is the true story of Christi Paul's journey with verbal and emotional abuse. Because she lived with that experience, the author does a good job of showing the abuse she suffered and how she dealt with it. This is her story, from how she met her ex-husband, to how she got out of the relationship and dealt with the aftermath. I found this to be an interesting read."
I bought this book with caution, having bought christian books on relationship abuse before, being very disappointed in them. I admit to being curious, as to how she met her 2nd (and current) husband, within a few short years, after her 1st marriage. He sounds like everything her first husband WASNT, and I wish her all the happiness to come. She had extensive counseling (I couldnt afford this then or now), a very good support team of friends/family (even her in laws!)..which speeded up her recovery. I had friends, or I wouldnt have made it through my own ordeal. At least she had enough sense NOT to bring children into that marriage, and that she got out, before many more years of misery. I didnt, mine was 3 sons and 28 years, but I did leave. It is SO rare for any christian books about spousal abuse to be written anyway. This is a good book to share. More on this subject needs to be 'out there'.
A brutally honest book about the triumph and hardships of overcoming emotional abuse.
Christi Paul tells her personal story of suffering and overcoming emotional abuse, that came in the form of someone she loved.
Love Isn't Supposed to Hurt was a well written read that was engaging, yet hard to read for me personally because of the nature of the content. As I read my heart was breaking for Christi, and it reminded me of how hard it is to stand up for yourself when you are being hurt. The book follows Christi through the tumultuous times of her first marriage, and the long process of healing.
I think this was a very inspiring read, not only for others who have suffered abuse from a spouse but also for people who have experienced bullying or any other kind of hurt caused by another's words.
Overall this was a well written book, that was encouraging and inspiring. I loved how it was deeply personal, even though she never revealed her ex's full name. There were some scenes that were depicted that had implied curse words, they weren't there, but I could figure out what they were originally. I didn't have a problem with that though because it it what truly happened in Ms. Paul's life and she did job of writing from the heart, I could feel the emotion in each page. She had a strong inspiring faith, and there were many times when she got back up when I thought she was at the end of her rope. Very well done. Though this is a book that I am not likely to read again, but would recommend to people who want to read a heartfelt book of overcoming a haunting hurt.
modern day Abigail..I am reminded of Denise Jackson's It's Not About Him and Brenda Warner's One Call Away.
Love Isn't Suppose to Hurt is the story of redemption: a woman's story of enduring a spouse's verbal/physical abuse (hanging on), divorce (letting go), and restoration (clinging to God). Thank you Ms. Paul for sharing your story. Absolutely amazing!
A message for healing... Healing is born when we get real with ourselves. Ms. Paul finds peace by being raw and trusting in God with all her heart and leaning not on her own understanding for this situation. Love Isn't Suppose to Hurt is a story about breaking free from the bonds that hold us back from being the whole person God called us to be.
A message for forgiveness...and when you forgive someone, you unchain yourself from anger that's clinging to you. P. 131-135 are the best written within the text. Ms. Paul clarifies what forgives means. It means you're finished holding on to your own anger and resentment. On the following page, Just because you forgive the one who hurt you, it doesn't make that person suddenly safe. Thank you for such truth. Ms. Paul goes on to quote Beth Moore, "Our self-condemning hearts can't block our forgiveness, but they can keep us from feeling forgiven. The result will be a twisted resignation to our own capacity to sin rather than any confidence in God's capacity to restore us."
A message for all women. Love Isn't Suppose to Hurt is a story that needs to be told again and again because these circumstances happen to woman everyday; this is the story of women I know. As a mother, I pray that God will give me wisdom to protect and guide my daughters in this area. Thank you, Ms. Paul, for sharing your healing exercises at the end of the book focusing on gratitude and thanking God. ...He's ready to open the gates of grace every time we fall.
The true life story of the author's marriage to an emotionally draining and abusive husband. Isolated from her family and friends she was drawn to him by his charming yet tempering personality. Challenges and dangers she faced at his hand led her to make sensible decisions on the quest of finding something meaningful and precious in her life. Through it all God is faithful and true.
My heart went out to the author for what she had endured. The choices she made has lessons and sound advice for all who are living with abuse. An eyeopening must read book, so needed today, will cause the reader to recognize personality traits and habits and know how to avoid them before making livelong decisions. Thanks to the author for having the courage to get her story out so that others may benefit. Well written!