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Customer Reviews for David C. Cook Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity

David C. Cook Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity

In this newly revised edition of Unfaithful: Hope & Healing After Infidelity Gary and Mona Shriver share from their hearts what it was like to rebuild their marriage after Gary confessed to a three-year affair and a one-night stand. The impact of that affair was devastating but they were able to endure, rebuild their trust, and ultimately restore their marriage. They want couples who find themselves in a similar scenario to know that with God's help they can learn to move beyond the crisis stage to a place of hope. In this revised version of the book you will find a new chapter on emotional affairs, extensive text revision, and a new cover. Paperback version. A Focus on the Family Recommendation.
Average Customer Rating:
4.6 out of 5
4.6
 out of 
5
(15 Reviews) 15
Open Ratings Snapshot
Rating Snapshot (15 reviews)
5 stars
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14 out of 1593%customers would recommend this product to a friend.
Customer Reviews for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Review 1 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

This book got us on the road to healing

Date:November 4, 2013
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Incredibly useful
Location:Wasilla, AK
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
This book had a transforming effect on my husband and me. A major crisis hit us when years of infidelity was confessed...we didn't know where to turn. I (wife) began reading this book and it made me realize that I wasn't alone...and that I could and should be honest about what I needed to know. My husband began to read it, begrudgingly, and realized he needed to come completely clean. Gary and Mona Shriver shared their experience in such a way that it ministered to exactly the parts of each of us (my husband and me) that needed to be ministered to. God has an incredible of way of meeting us where we need to be met. And He did that for us through this book!
Along with Debra Laaser's book, Shattered Vows, this book gave my husband and me the perspective and hope we needed to realize that we could not only recover from adultery, but our marriage could be healed by the Almighty and made beautiful from the ashes. We were put on the right path, the right considerations planted in our hearts and minds, because Gary and Mona had the courage to write a book about the hope and healing God brings when we submit to Him and do things His way.
There is also a lot of practical information in this book, from the struggle itself to the boundaries that we need to think about when we finally make the commitment to see our marriages through as God would have us do. I would (and have) recommend(ed) this book to anyone who is going through adultery recovery--or even considering taking that difficult but rewarding route.
One note: Gary and Mona's story is about a "limited" amount of adultery (if there is such a thing). Debra Laaser's book is geared more for those who have been dealing with sexual addiction or adulterous behavior that is more than just a once or twice scenario, which is what my husband's and my experience was.
+1point
1of 1voted this as helpful.
Review 2 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

Date:January 9, 2013
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Nette
Location:Baton Rouge, LA
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
This book certainly helped me to understand the journey ahead of me. Mona & Gary do a great job of explaining the experience from their perspective. In many cases, me and Mona could be the same person. This also helped me to understan what my husband is feeling as the infidel. He is not great at expressing his own hurts and he tends to hold everything in and that could look like uncaring. I feel if my feelings are likened to that of Mona's, he must have some common feelings like Gary. I certainly am more willing to see from his perspective and looking forward to healing.
+2points
2of 2voted this as helpful.
Review 3 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Hurt so good.

Date:November 27, 2012
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cloud9
Location:Minnesota
Age:45-54
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
In the midst of the darkest days of my life this was one of the first books God brought me. I felt like I was going crazy with the hurt. In one chapter the Shrivers related how they felt like they were "overreacting or going crazy" and they heard a broadcast on focus on family about a woman who endured the holocaust. That woman witnessed horrific atrocities most of will never experience or understand ,yet when she came to the states , married and endured her husbands affair with him leaving her, she stated :"That experience was the most painful experience of her life." That story, along with the sincere retelling of the Shrivers personal and others they share, brought empathizing to my very lonely heart I sometimes wonder if I would have died without it. Well meaning people show up out of nowhere at the worst times, full of advice , and cause More pain . Books have the power to do that if you end up hearing a list of "you shoulds ." The pain of an affair is a very isolating and very alone grief. Grief is lightened if you can share it , but who listens to such intimate details of sexual betrayal? To be heard and believed is a vital part of healing from sexual betrayal. The Shrivers write in a way that validated my deep pain. Still pain, but heard. They don't leave you there either. There is a lot of direction they give that slowly brings you to a place of even believing there IS light at the end of this dark , long tunnel. The timeline of ESTIMATED healing at the end of the book is worth it to me. I re-read that to my husband when I sense he is creeping into being impatient with me. Betrayers commonly want to "move ahead" a LOT faster then the hurting spouse, causing even more pain. The chapter on forgiveness is sensitive, hard and vital to healing. Mona went through many scriptures helping the hurting to know what forgivenes really is , and what it is NOT, how it feels and does not need to feel to be real forgiveness. I am still wearing out my copy , it is well marked up. The only caution I will warn to the hurting spouse is about the chapter on Admitting Our Roles. In discussing the distance that can happen in a marriage from failures in both the husband or wife ; at first I was in such pain I had to skip that part until I had felt a little more understanding from him, and felt a little heard. Maybe that chapter could have fallen later in the book. The point is to heal the marriage, not just recover from this horrific betrayal. The chapter on emotional affairs was very excellent and should be read by every married couple , in my opinion.I saw understanding come to him a little more as I read the stories of others to him. Its a slow healing process, this book was a big help,along with the Lord and others who have survived affairs.
+1point
2of 3voted this as helpful.
Review 4 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Hopeful!!

Date:October 25, 2012
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Lala
Age:18-24
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
This book was so touching! I was thankful for the honesty of the writers and their journey through adultery! I received this book for free for my Kindle and God put it strongly on my heart to read this book so that I could get assurance for my marriage since my husband has a pornography problem! I'm so glad I read the book because it gave me so much hope for my marriage and that I am not alone! Very powerful!!
+1point
1of 1voted this as helpful.
Review 5 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Date:November 2, 2012
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donner
Location:Fort Mill SC
Age:45-54
Gender:female
This book was a tremendous help for me. I found out in August that my husband had been embroiled in TWO affairs over the past four years. You just don't know how in the world you can proceed, but with God's grace you can, as the Shriver's so openly and honestly shared. It was helpful - even though painful to read - to be able to hear the 'infidel's' feelings/perspective. As the victim, it's hard to really care too much about the one who has just ripped your heart out, but so good to come together broken, find out what caused the weak link that allowed vulnerability, and HEAL. When you take into account what you have BEEN forgiven by the Lord, I just don't think you can withhold forgiveness from someone who is truly repentant, truly sorry, and willing to recommit to the marriage. I am so incredibly grateful that out of all the marriages falling apart, God chose to intervene, to move in my husband's heart, and that he chose me, chose to take the hard road of broken honesty and rebuilding.
The section on emotional affairs was so dead on - if that doesn't make people understand they need to always be on guard to protect their marriages and their hearts, nothing will. You don't have to go looking for trouble, it is always there waiting for you! Build that wall of protection, value and cherish each other so that no evil can come between you.
Thank you, Gary and Mona, for sharing your story of hope.
+2points
2of 2voted this as helpful.
Review 6 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

It was exactly what I needed!

Date:June 1, 2012
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Mist
Location:New Mexico
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
I needed something to occupy my mind when I was flooded with the pain of my husband's infidelity! I prayed and God directed me right to this book. Mona and Gary have offered myself and my husband biblical knowledge that is vital to our marriage.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 7 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

This book will help both parties.

Date:October 25, 2011
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st3g
Location:Alabama
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
In a time of such crisis, no one feels normal. This book will help you both know that this is actually normal. This book, in addition to other counseling or books, can really put things into perspective. People make mistakes everyday. God forgives us and we should forgive others, then true healing can begin. There really is hope.
+2points
2of 2voted this as helpful.
Review 8 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Great Help in difficult times

Date:August 29, 2011
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Peter
Location:Wanaka, New Zealand
Age:45-54
Gender:male
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
A great book and DVD to help with the healing during a very difficult time
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 9 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

Very Helpful on your road through recovery.

Date:August 11, 2011
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Flower
Location:British Columbia, Canada
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Value: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
This book help me realize that no person is alone in dealing with infidelity. God is on our side helping us heal the hurt infidelity causes both the spouse and the infidel. The Shriver's share the most painful experience of their lives and help you understand your own feelings. They give practical tools to help heal the pain and they do it with it being based in God's word.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 10 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Date:May 6, 2011
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naynay
Location:Bakersfield, CA
Age:45-54
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Very good information in this book. It was very helpful in the healing process. I would strongly recommend to anyone who is going through this process in their life.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 11 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Excellent, very helpful, quick reading

Date:February 21, 2011
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Christian Books
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Very helpful material, recommend to anyone in this situation.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 12 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Hope for the weary

Date:December 25, 2010
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DaisyBeauty
Location:St. Paul, MN
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
I went onto FOTF website after my world was rocked by the revelation that my husband had had an affair. Someone had recommended this book to another person on one of the forums and I decided that I should read it. This has been one of the best purchases I have ever made. It has helped me to realize a lot about how to properly heal from something like this. It also made me realize that my husband and I had already taken the right steps to ensure that our relationship would survive this kind of blow. My Savior is amazing and will continue to be faithful to those who are faithful to Him. I hope that this book helps many, many more people who find themselves in a situation they never imagined being in, as it has for me and my husband.
+4points
4of 4voted this as helpful.
Review 13 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
2 out of 5
2 out of 5

Date:November 2, 2010
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Saddened
Location:California
Age:55-65
Gender:female
Quality: 
3 out of 5
3 out of 5
Value: 
3 out of 5
3 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
2 out of 5
2 out of 5
This book was alittle disappointing for me. Too much details about the time periods and what he said and did and what she said and did. I didn't find it to be what I expected.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 14 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Excellent book. I highly recommend it.

Date:October 29, 2010
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Bonblue
Location:Amarillo
Age:35-44
Gender:male
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
This book is AWESOME. Thanks to Mona and Gary for helping me during this very difficult time in my life. It is great for husbands and wives. It has helped me understand what my wife is going through because of my infidelity.
0points
0of 0voted this as helpful.
Review 15 for Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Honest, non-academic approach, very readable

Date:October 25, 2010
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quiltmaker
Location:Anchorage, AK
Age:45-54
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Gary and Mona share their experiences with heart-rending sincerity, honesty and openness. The book is their story of this unique devastation and the long, painful journey to build their marriage. Books by trained counselors are helpful, and a counselor's perspective and insight is invaluable. However, as couples try to recover from the horror of adultery, there is no substitute for hearing from the hearts of people who have taken the journey themselves. Highly recommended.
+1point
1of 1voted this as helpful.