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Customer Reviews for Thomas Nelson The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts

Thomas Nelson The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts

For years, best-selling author and speaker Shannon Ethridge has counseled women and men on the complexities of marriage and sexuality. During that time she's noticed that most people either fall into one of two camps when it comes to sexual fantasies. They either beat themselves up for every sexual thought they have, heaping guilt and shame upon themselves, or they have gone to the other extreme, following their thoughts and acting out on their desires to unfortunate consequences. Ethridge believes a balance can be found between these two extremes.

In The Fantasy Fallacy, she takes a closer look at the role of sexual fantasy in our hearts and minds, to show what can be learned from these powerful thoughts. Rather than running from them, or ignoring them, there is truth to be found about ourselves and our relationships hiding under the surface. By discovering the meaning behind the lie that your fantasies present, you can face your fears, heal your heart from past wounds, and find spiritual and physical freedom.
Average Customer Rating:
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4.8
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20 out of 20100%customers would recommend this product to a friend.
Customer Reviews for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Review 1 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Great Information

Date:December 17, 2012
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Robert Samuels
Age:45-54
Gender:male
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
This book gave me a great deal of insight into how people try to resolve pain and unresolve issues in theri lives.
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Review 2 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

The Fantasy Fallacy

Date:December 8, 2012
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Amanda
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
The Fantasy Fallacy
This book was available just in time. I had been besieged with offers to read the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, even by women I know in the church. My resolve to avoid it was beginning to crumble. I knew that I would be opening a door to temptation I would be hard pressed to shut, but I was thinking that perhaps I was being too legalistic. After all, not everyone who drinks becomes an alcoholic. And, isn’t the Song of Solomon pretty racy, too? Well, Shannon Ethridge has written a glorious and freeing book tackling a sensitive subject, our sexual fantasies, with honesty and biblical perspective. She is non-judgmental and keenly insightful. How exhilarating to have a Christian woman explain that, yes, we can be holy and horny at the same time! I’ve only ever wondered that. No one has really stated it so bluntly. Normally, a Christian book about sex skirts around the tough issues, allegorizing things away, and leaves the reader feeling like they don’t quite measure up to God’s expectations of us in the bedroom. Finally, someone lets us know that we aren’t alone…or nasty….or a disappointment to God. That we can control our fantasies and release the guilt. That our fantasies have roots in our fallen pasts, unique to each individual. That the church should be a place of refuge, not rejection. This has to be my favorite Booksneeze offering to date. Thank you so much, Shannon, for being a wise and accessible woman. I think I’ll stick to my plan of avoiding the books….not because I need to look down my nose at them, but because I know myself well enough to know that I don’t need to put my hand in the lion’s mouth to experience God’s deliverance…..
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com <http://BookSneeze.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255
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Review 3 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Much needed book

Date:December 5, 2012
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nomer15
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
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"The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts" by Shannon Ethridge was written primarily as a response to the "Fifty Shades of Grey" trilogy. However, it goes far beyond being a simple response. Ethridge digs deeply into the uncomfortable world of sexual fantasy. A topic that is generally seen as a taboo subject among Christians is covered in great detail and depth in this book. The book includes nine chapters, covering topics such as why do we even need to talk about sexual fantasies and then delving into what some common fantasies are, and five appendices with great resources for individuals or churches.
I appreciated that Ethridge was so very real in this book. She talked about her own issues with fantasies. She really took the time to explain common fantasies and helped the reader to explore the deeper meanings behind them. She helps the reader to address their fantasies and channel them in the appropriate, healthy context of marriage.
This is a book that is long overdue for our sex-absorbed culture. Christians are not immune to the temptations and the pull of fantasies. It's time for the Church to start confronting some of these elephants in the room, and this book is a great starting place for the discussion.
"At times, we may need to look to the God-given gift of mental fantasy to fuel our sexual passions and imaginations in marriage. Other times, we may need to reel in our thoughts to stay out of dangerous territory. Either way, whether we are intentionally opening our minds or trying to guard them, there are great benefits to peeling back the layers of our sexual thoughts to under their deeper meaning. And once we've done so, we're better equipped to help others do the same." (p. xxvi)
(I’ve received this complimentary book from Thomas Nelson Publishing House through the Book Sneeze program in exchange for a review. A positive review was not required and the views expressed in my review are strictly my own.)
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Review 4 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Important for our current world!

Date:December 1, 2012
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Rena Nunley
Location:North Carolina
Age:55-65
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
THE FANTASY FALLACY by Shannon Ethridge is a Christian treatise of sexual fantasies. This is backed by logical sense, Biblical helps and her own experience as a Christian counselor who specializes in this area. Shannon also gives real-life examples of some who have struggled or are struggling with these chains.
The angles and areas that are covered seem to be all-encompassing...and then some! The introduction, nine chapters and six appendixes give many details, most of which many of us have never even heard of, much less had experience with. However, considering the world we live in today, they are details which must be confronted and treated if there is to be any solution of or exit from the mental, emotional and spiritual prisons in which so many find themselves. She gives consideration to married and single people as well as to homosexuals. There was some doubt in my mind at first regarding her treatment of the latter but then this is not a treatise of them, per se, but of the fantasy aspect. Interestingly, much more than just fantasies is treated. The root problems of such (which would include past events and experiences), one's attitude and spiritual condition are also considered in depth. Even if the reader does not necessarily directly need this type of help, this sort of information would be invaluable in trying to help those who do.
I struggled a bit with some of the graphic descriptions but also realized that in order to treat this, one has to use such descriptions. A regular medical doctor uses exact medical language with his patients in order to explain the problem, the solution and what he must do to get there. This is rarely a pretty and pleasant experience but certainly very necessary.
The positive aspect of hope is the bright light at the end of this dark and enslaving tunnel. But this is only possible because of the Lord, His Word and the solution that is found within. This Shannon accomplishes. This book gives hope to the most dire of cases. And for this reason I recommend it and give it a 5-star.
(I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255.)
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Review 5 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Great

Date:November 21, 2012
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Tracy
Location:Canada
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
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I received "The fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the deeper meaning behind sexual thoughts" from Booksneeze for review. When I read that it was a book about why women are going crazy for the 50 shades, and the deeper meanings behind it, I thought that it would be a worthwhile ministry read.
I was very impressed with the author, there have been a couple of books out that involve Christianity and sex, yet all seem to be more "fluff" than anything overly helpful or insightful. Ethridge went far beyond that, she was willing to get into the "Uncomfortable topics" and give an honest look and insight into the sexual thought process, (I found this more geared towards women, however I'm sure plenty of men could benefit from this book as well!).
Honestly I think this is a book that our Church leaders need to read, it gives some fantastic insight into women and their thoughts, while being in a Godly "Atmosphere". Ethridge makes good use of Scripture, and keeps the Scripture in context (which I appreciate!).
All in all, I would say I highly recommend this book, especially for leaders!
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Review 6 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

The Fantasy Fallacy

Date:November 19, 2012
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Jamie
Location:Sylvan Lake
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
All I can say about this book is WOW! I love the way that Shannon tells it like it is. I was hooked by the second page and just could not put the book down.
Ever since I met Shannnon at a Women's Retreat at my home church, I have been in love with her "no-holds barred" style of writing. There is definitely no sugar-coating in this book.
In most churches, it is taboo to even mention the word "sex" in a sermon and yet it is a topic that desperately needs to be discussed within the church. Children are becoming sexually active at an earlier age, spouses are stepping outside their marriages to create a little spark and yet the church continues to remain silent on the issue.
I thank God so much for Shannon Ethridge. So many people go through life feeling guilty about their dreams and fantasies, never knowing how to deal with them.
After reading this book I am even more inspired to try and live a pure life. This book is written primarily with the Christian Wife in mind, but there are lots of ``golden nuggets`` that would be helpful for men as well.
When I first heard that this book had been released, I prepared myself that all I would be reading is ``sex is bad`` and that fantasies will always steer me in the wrong direction.
``Fantasies have deep psychological roots, and if acted on many of them can do psychological damage. Rather than let fantasies rule us, let`s take out the sting and bring them under God`s rule, allowing the Lord to heal us from the brokenness and insecurities that cause inappropriate fantasies to haunt us.``
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Review 7 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Gain control over unhealthy sexual fantasies

Date:November 12, 2012
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Christianfictionaddiction
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
The best-selling author of the Every Woman's Battle Series returns with her latest book, The Fantasy Fallacy. Within the pages of the book, Shannon Ethridge explores the deep psychological roots behind our fantasies, noting that they are the brain's way of trying to heal from unresolved tragedies and traumas. She candidly takes a look at some difficult topics, including gay and lesbian desires, desires for threesomes, or fascinations with pornography, bondage or sadomasochism. Shannon teaches the reader how to take each fantasy captive to Christ and allowing Jesus to heal us from our brokenness that leads to inappropriate fantasies.
Shannon Ethridge is a fantastic author whose book is extremely timely for a generation who has become addicted to pornography and enamored with books like "Fifty Shades of Grey". I greatly appreciate how she tackles each subject in a straight-forward manner, not shying away from disturbing topics, but instead addressing them in a non-judgmental manner. I found the book to be a breath of fresh air, a book that will absolutely lead readers to a place of freedom. I appreciated the practical nature of the book, that she includes ideas to control unwanted fantasies. She provides a wonderfully balanced look at the topic of sexuality, recognizing that sex is an absolute gift from God and is meant to be something good, and shows us how we can keep the perverse from twisting this wonderful gift. The book simply breathes with scripture, and as such you can read this book knowing it is based on truth.
I strongly recommend this book, and award it a rating of 4 out of 5 stars. If you or someone you know is struggling in the area of purity, then this book may just have the guidance you are looking for!
Book has been provided courtesy of the publisher, Thomas Nelson, and the Booksneeze program, for the purposes of this unbiased review.
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Review 8 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

truth in sexual fantasies

Date:November 1, 2012
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markbraye
Location:Temiskaming Shores, Ontario, Canada
Age:25-34
Gender:male
Quality: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Value: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
the Fifty Shades of Grey books have taken on a life of their own. there's even imitation books and feature films may be in the works. the book inspired a skit on SNL, it's been talked about, trashed or endorsed, on TV, the radio, and the internet, and even some European hotels have replaced the Gideon Bibles in their rooms with copies of Fifty Shades of Grey.
Shannon Ethridge is an author, speaker, lay counselor, and her latest book is The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing The Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts. it is, as the top of the book cover states, "A Response To The 50 Shades Of Grey Phenomenon."
it's a great read from an intelligent author. Ethridge is thoughtful, caring, and wants people to live healthy lives.
she explores sexual thoughts over nine wonderful chapters.
1. Why Discuss Sexual Fantasies?
2. The Benefits of Boundaries.
3. The Faces Behind Sexual Fantasies.
4. Pornography: The Fantasy Factor.
5. Bartering With Our Bodies.
6. When "One Flesh" Isn't Enough Flesh.
7. Grappling With Gay And Lesbian Fantasies.
8. Our Fascination With Pleasure, Pain, And Power.
9. Putting Fantasy In It's Place.
the appendicies are excellent as well.
Ethridge's vision for the book is stated early, in a short section entitled "Note to the Reader: Fifty Shades Of Reality." she writes: "...I'm praying the same prayer over you [readers] that I've prayer over myself - that God would give you eyes to view all things sexual through His lens, and no one else's."
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Review 9 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Fantastic book inspires & covers taboo topics

Date:October 27, 2012
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Harmony Wheeler
Age:18-24
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
I had the privilege of hearing Shannon Ethridge speak at Biola University before I graduated. The humble and loving woman poured out her heart to us college students, revealing much of her darkest moments and God's grace in pulling her out of a life stuck in the gutter. While Shannon's new book, "The Fantasy Fallacy," does not go into the same details (which I'm told are in her other books), it deals with the taboo topic of sex and fantasy - and, as a response the "50 Shades of Grey" phenomenon, it works very well.
But don't expect a rant against the immoral plot elements of the popular novel series. "Grey" only gets two or three mentions in "Fantasy Fallacy." Instead, Shannon explores the reasons why we as humans seem to enjoy reading books like these and why we indulge in our fantasies. Anyone who has read, is considering reading, or has friends who have read the "50 Shades" series will be able to have ideas for discussion after reading "Fantasy Fallacy." You don't have to have sexual struggles to get something out of the book. With plenty of examples and just enough Scripture in hand, Shannon pull the reader in and challenges you to look at why you are the way you are. Sure, there's plenty to explore here about society's reasons for sex and fantasy, but Shannon's talent is in giving us plenty to think about and giving us free space to discuss and learn about the taboo topics hardly ever discussed at church.
I highly recommend this book to anyone and everyone.
*Disclaimer: I was given this book in exchange for my honest review of it.
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Review 10 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

The Fantasy Fallacy - A GPS to Healing and Freedom

Date:October 23, 2012
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Marlee Amanda
Location:Saint John, New Brunswick, Canada
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
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In the mist of the Fifty Shades of Grey craze comes Shannon Ethridge’s The Fantasy Fallacy and I can say with certainty that it’s right on time. The courage to stand up and speak out on a subject swept under the carpet by the church and society is commendable and gutsy. After reading The Fantasy Fallacy I’m more convinced than ever that we need to open up more about “what’s going on between our ears.” The Fantasy Fallacy pulls back the curtains and sheds much needed light on a once dark and lonely place in the minds of most human beings . . . the world of sexual fantasy. This book serves as an ice-breaker to give courage to those who feel trapped and controlled by their fantasies to discover the roots and break free from the bondage they create. The Fantasy Fallacy exchanges the label of “FREAK” for “HUMAN” and in doing so gives voice and power back to those desperately trying to find their way out of the tangled web of the fantasy world. For some it will serve as a GPS to freedom, for others it will serve as a loudspeaker to confirm what they already know and wake them up to the solutions they have been ignoring.
Whether you are Christian struggling with guilt and condemnation from yourself or the church, or whether you are just the average person with no spiritual or religious affiliation; The Fantasy Fallacy is a MUST READ. Anyone who is a human being can and will benefit from reading this book. Whether you discover new principles for overcoming unhealthy fantasy or whether you are just building on a previously laid foundation, I can assure you this book is worth the read. The Fantasy Fallacy gives everyone the permission to be human, the courage to be honest, and the things we need to navigate our way from bondage to freedom.
One cannot thank Shannon enough for answering the call of God and writing this book. The world has needed her bravery, her honesty, and her obedience. Thank you for daring to venture into taboo territory and by doing so freeing many captives.
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Review 11 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

Finally a SANE voice in thefantasy conversation!

Date:October 21, 2012
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EvitaG
Location:New York, NY
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
I just finished this book a few days ago, and I have to honestly admit - nearly the whole time I read it I found myself actually saying out lous "Ah - so that's why....!" Enlightenment is an understatement. Shannon "goes there" on so many critical topics, with a refreshing voice of support and nonjudgmental-ism. The narrative feels like you are having a conversation with her, which I appreciate. Her vulnerability about her own personal struggles add authenticity to the truth that comes across from her education in counseling and years of helping others in these areas.
So here's my candid summary of what I read:
Cons:
- Absolutely for a Christian audience. The book presumes the reader has placed their lives under the authority of the Bible and Judeo-Christian beliefs. (this is only a con because it limits the books audience and yet the "meat" of her message can ABSOLUTELY cross faith lines.)
- Those who are theologically nit-picky may stumble on a few ways she words things as she sets herself up in the beginning of the book. (Which would be a cryin' shame as the main topics in the book are SPOT on, eye-opening, and liberating. It would be a shame if someone was so hung up on using "reformed Christian" terms versus "armenian Christian" terms that they missed the whole point of the book.)
Pros:
- While not a direct response to the whole "50 Shades" popularity, the book itself is VERY timely for people who call themselves Christians who may have read the series. It doesn't simply say "you should read/like those trashy books" in some judgemental "church lady" way, but rather maturely explains the science behind the human brain's creation of fantasy and how that is beneficial or detrimental to our well-being depending on the content of those fantasies. Very clear headed, open-minded, and truth filled.
- True to Shannon Ethridge's form, she also speaks from a "celebrate healthy sex lives!!" perspective, which for the Christian world is refreshing and - sad to say - rare. Her addressing negative/detrimental fantasy tendencies comes from a motive to see people have incredible sex lives, not to stifle any of the hot burnin' love
- She is just so darn RATIONAL when it comes to things like S & M, pornography, incest and things of that nature. Making no excuses for the bluntness with which she shares, she peels back initial "shock" feelings to expose what's going on in people's hearts.
Overall, I HIGHLY recommend this book to the following types of people: CHRISTIAN men and women (married or single)and secular audiences with a strong knowledge of the Christian views on such topics as abstinence 'til marriage, homosexuality, etc.
This is probably a book I will by several copies of (like I wanted to do with her other book "The Sexually Confident Wife") and give out to my Christian friends. God KNOWS we need more conversations about these topics in the church.
Disclaimer: I received a free book in order to write this review and have shared my honest opinion.
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Review 12 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

A true gem in the world today!

Date:October 20, 2012
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Christine
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Shannon is not afraid of speaking on the taboo subjects. This is the latest in her books that speaks to the hearts of so many hurting people, who really have no where else to go. This isn't a safe subject that gets talked about in church or sunday school. She offers amazing insights and resources for the hurting, and those affected by this area of society today. I am so thankful for her and for all the books she has written!
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Review 13 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5

Bringing into the Light What is in Darkness

Date:October 20, 2012
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MamaCre8s
Location:Baltimore, MD
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
4 out of 5
4 out of 5
Wow! This book is desperately needed! I grew up in a strong Christian family and sex was never discussed. Of course, neither were fantasies. They weren't discussed in the home; nor were they discussed in church. No wonder we have fantasies and then feel bad about them! If it's not discussed it MUST be taboo; and if it's taboo to discuss, it MUST be bad. Shannon Ethridge begs to differ.
I love that Shannon Ethridge is not judgmental. She takes a look at many fantasies and brings them into the light. The fantasies themselves are not evil; and when exposed to the light, darkness has no hold on them or people who have them. Shannon's research indicates that the fantasies we entertain are not always rooted in the sexual acts themselves and we don't have to act on them. We can control our fantasies instead of allowing our fantasies to control us.
This book touched me personally. There was much within its pages that resonated with my life; either in my history or that of people I love. It is my hope that more people will put aside the Shade-y books, and pick up some truth and support in Shannon Ethridge's Fantasy Fallacy. These are topics that need to be discussed; and this book is a great start.
I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion. The opinion provided here is completely my own.
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Review 14 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

there has never been a book written like this!

Date:October 19, 2012
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Ruth
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
The moment I opened this book, I knew it was inspired by the Holy Spirt. I was so excited to see what this fresh word would be. I anticipated learning a lot. What I did not anticipate was the healing the Lord would do in me. Ethridge talks about fantasy in a way that makes the reader at ease. She reaches deep into the dark places of the human heart, where few dare to go, and encourages us gently to go there and face them. To stop ignoring what scares us, and learn to look objectively at them. And with God's help, learn the deeper reason, the deeper pain that we silently and unknowingly run from. She explains the freedom that comes from bringing the darkness to light. She does this with out condemning pleasurable sex and even some fantasy inside marriage. She speaks it like it is and sheds light on God's most fulfilling plan for sex. She paints a beautiful picture of God's love and compassion for us, that brought me to tears. This is a must read!
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Review 15 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Helpful Like No Other Book Out There!

Date:October 19, 2012
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JPenar
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
There are many people - in the Body of Christ, especially - who have been made to feel that the subject of sexual fantasies is wholly evil, and never to even be discussed, and it's been to our collective detriment. We SUFFER from the lack of honest, compassionate discussion about this issue from a Biblical perspective. Shannon Ethridge (Who also authored "The Sexually Confident Wife: Connecting with Your Husband Mind Body Heart Spirit") has written a book that is not meant to arouse or to Bible-thump or to argue about "Right vs. Wrong" (Plenty of all THAT elsewhere!). It's meant to give us the tools to "connect [our] own dots and make sense of our sexual thoughts" (p. 118) and bring healing at nearly the deepest, most profound level one can get.
"The Fantasy Fallacy" dives right into the darkness, and brings the light of truth with it as a guide. It has amazed me, and has resonated in my SOUL like no other book on this subject (and I've read just about every one from a Christian perspective that I could find).
Written in Ethridge's engaging, self-deprecatingly honest and compassionate style. Well cited and thoroughly researched without becoming so clinical as to disengage the reader. This is a FAST read, but by no means unsatisfying. And for those concerned, I was pleased to read the entire book, even the one that covers BDSM fantasies, without feeling I was -burdened- with information that was unnecessary. Ethridge does an AMAZING job of walking the extremely fine line of being explicit enough to HELP, without being SO explicit as to HARM that is presented by this primal and complex subject.
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Review 16 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

A much needed book!!

Date:October 17, 2012
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ChristyK
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
When Fifty Shades of Grey came out I knew many women that thought the book was great. Many of my friends were outraged and insulted that women would find these books entertaining. I think it just shows the importance of a book like the Fantasy Fallacy! Sex is often times a subject that is difficult to discuss and sexual thoughts are even harder! The Fantasy Fallacy was written to help us understand why we think about sex, what kind of sexual thoughts we have, and how to reconcile that in our lives.
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Review 17 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Healing Salve for a Deep Wound

Date:October 17, 2012
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EGrainger
Location:Norfolk, VA
Age:35-44
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
*The Fantasy Fallacy* is like a healing salve on a deep wound. It is the single most refreshing, influential, and grace-filled book dealing with human sexuality I have ever read. Ethridge eschews the misconstruction that psychology and a Biblical worldview do not belong on the same team. Instead, she seamlessly weaves truths from both, showing how our needs for healthy sexuality and spirituality are interwoven into our DNA.
I especially appreciate the chapter examining the "softer side of God", God as perfect Mother as well as Father, and Ethridge's practical tips for allowing God's grace (power to avoid sin in the first place) into our sexual and relational temptations.
Through *The Fantasy Fallacy*, Ethridge not only gives a timely response to the *50 Shades of Grey* phenomenon, she also offers so much more... an invitation for readers to honestly and compassionately (re)examine their sexual fantasies as a tool for discovering the beautiful, God-given gifts of true sexual and spiritual intimacy.
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Review 18 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Excellent topic! LONG OVERDUE!

Date:October 15, 2012
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lasersmiledr
Location:Dallas, Tx
Age:45-54
Gender:male
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
(click to see the video)
Over the years, I have read almost all of Shannon's books as well as Stephen Auterburn. This topic, is essential for today's Christians and churches! It seems that human sexuality is a taboo subject for Christians as well as their families. We are taught to guard our mind and hearts, and to keep our thoughts subject to the will of Christ, but seldom if ever do we talk about HOW to accomplish such a feat! With the onslaught of today's secular culture, we as Christians can be overwhelmed in a subject that is so limited in discussion. Additionally, this book gave me some insight with how to love, cope with and help friends and family members that are now a part of the gay and lesbian society. Marriage, is a difficult relationship at best. Seldom do we realize the baggage that we are carrying into that relationship. This book has been an experience in self realization and self examination in order to be a better, husband, father, and person. I HIGHLY recommend reading this one more than once as doors will begin to open in closets that have been closed for years. Only then, can the healing begin! Thanks Shannon for a GREAT message, ministry and book!
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Review 19 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5

Refreshing Realism for Sexuality Today-A Must Read

Date:October 11, 2012
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Jessica Richter
Location:Port Arthur, TX
Age:25-34
Gender:female
Quality: 
5 out of 5
5 out of 5
Value: 
5 out of 5
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Meets Expectations: 
5 out of 5
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Shannon has done an amazing job again. Healthy sexual relationships and integrity to God's word for how sexuality should play out in our lives is her forte.
Today's age is bombarded with sexual innuendo and explicitness at every turn. It is becoming more and more extreme, like chasing the dragon, and people are trying to follow it in their bedroom. It is something that is an epidemic in the "real world" but something rarely addressed in the church. With this book Shannon opens the door to an equal playing field for both sides of the line to openly talk about and understand the elephant in the room, our fantasies, and how to deal with them properly.
She has provided very thorough research on the psychology behind our thoughts that is worded for everyone to understand and real life, intimate testimonies that makes the reader know that they aren't the odd man out and not the only one having these thoughts. Shannon encourages us to glean the lessons from facing your past that your fantasies are trying to heal itself from.
This is a highly, highly recommended book for anyone out there. It's something that relates to all!
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Review 20 for The Fantasy Fallacy: Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
Overall Rating: 
3 out of 5
3 out of 5

Date:October 10, 2012
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DUCKgirl
Age:25-34
Gender:female
The Fantasy Fallacy Exposing the Deeper Meaning Behind Sexual Thoughts
By Shannon Ethridge
Published by Thomas Nelson
Book Description
Erotica has invaded more than our minds – it has exploded onto our bestseller lists and into our bedrooms.
Many are looking to sexual and emotional fantasies as avenues to fulfillment. Our fantasies, however, are not reliable guides into the future—they are actually rocky road maps from our past. Best-selling author Shannon Ethridge theorizes, “Fantasies are simply the brain’s way of trying to heal itself from unresolved tragedies and traumas. We mentally compartmentalize our pain to make room for pleasure.”
Fantasies have deep psychological roots, and if acted on many of them can do deep psychological damage. Rather than let fantasies rule us, let’s take out the sting and bring them under God’s rule, allowing the Lord to heal us from the brokenness and insecurities that cause inappropriate fantasies to haunt us.
Without being judgmental or condemning, Shannon helps us dissect several common and often-disturbing topics, such as:
a distorted fascination with pornography
the mental pursuit of multiple partners
the lure of gay and lesbian desires
bondage, domination, and sadomasochism (BDSM)
With tips for controlling unwanted fantasies and resources for providing a safe haven for recovery, The Fantasy Fallacy helps us recognize and heal our emotional pain and equips us to help others do the same.
I really got excited to read this book based on the description from booksneeze.com. I really liked this book. It talks about how people have this fantasy they are always thinking about such as in dreams and such. And how those fantasies can be dreams, or porn,etc and how to look into a fantasy you are having and how to figure out why you are having that fantasy and what the real reason you are thinking those things and it can be different things from you life or childhood that mess us up emotionally or in our dreams.
I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
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